I’ve always had a thing for music streaming apps like iHeartradio and Tunein Radio because no matter where I am at in the world, I can always open the app and feel that much closer to my desired location. Home.
Tonight I wanted to be closer to home. I opened my Tunein Radio app, searched by country, state and then city…Detroit, MI. One minute later I found myself listening to Smooth Jazz AM 1200. Yep. This is perfect. Tonight I opted for something smooth. Something relaxing. Something that would make this nagging headache go away. I turned the lights off in my studio apartment, finished my bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch and begin writing. A faint hint of fabric softener graced the air.
I feel so at home. It’s funny how the smallest things can help you make light of what seems to be a huge ordeal. I texted one of my friends this evening to express my dissatisfaction with my work life balance. Exploitation. Being undervalued is never fun. People are greedy. Coming from a business background I’ve always had the ability to analyze situations with a very keen eye for detail and identify faults, whether it be an organization or an individual. My dad always reassures me of this and my mom always reminds me that life is full of stepping stones.
The truth is I am impatient.
There is an empire waiting on me. I just have to keep putting in the work. Tonight my friend told me to let go and let God. I knew this. But her reminder had much more impact than the voice inside of my head. Why is it always so difficult for us to let go and let God handle things? Of course we have to continue to work towards our goals, but God is ultimately in control. Let go of your worries, give them to God and let him soothe you. I feel so at home now.